By God's Grace

On Monday I got up early, drove 5 1/2 hours to New Bern in order to sign my contract and tour the campus at Craven C.C. When I arrived, no contract was ready for me to sign. Hmmm.... Then three of the properties I was to view were already rented, one agent was unable to find someone to show a property, and two places were just not ready for renting - really. Plus, Holiday Inn wanted me to pay way more for a reservation that I had booked ahead of time - no record of special rate. So I decided to just drive the 5 1/2 hours back to Lincolnton. Not too bad really other than a bit of bad rain for which I pulled off and waited out.

Then I was told that I had to have all of my class material, evaluation, assessment and communication on Blackboard (a management system) instead of my wiki, which I have spent the last 6 months refining. When you tell people up front that you teach in a certain way and integrate technological components in your classes, and they say "yea!" well, I guess you would expect to be able to use said components in the class. OR NOT!

Then today I got an email from my new chair while I was at Gaston meeting with students. She sent the "standard syllabus" and "schedule of assignments." Basically I am told what to teach and how to teach it. I started crying right there in my office. I had reached my limit.

Ben has said to me, almost since we started dating, that I am too trusting and a bit naive. Maybe that is the case. I just want to believe what people say to me. So when I voiced my concerns about being asked to teach in a way that went against my philosophy, I was told that all things are negotiable and could be worked out. So far, I do not see any consideration, any flexibility, except mine. I now teach 8am every day, 4 traditional courses, one late start and one online at Craven C.C. I also am teaching several online courses for Gaston College. I am encouraged to continue to grow and be creative at Gaston *sigh* - I gave up a job I was really starting to love for a place near the beach, a place not far from ECU (second master's degree study in spring), and a place where I may or not enjoy teaching.

But there is light at the end of my anxiety and disappointment. I received an email from home owners in New Bern who I have been corresponding with who said that they will remove the house from listing until I get there to view it and have the lease ready, no deposit required until then. Nice people! And I remembered, that in the end, everything works out, that God provides.