I have become one big question mark?

Do I push forward and complete my PhD? Do I continue to talk to investors about  my coffee house? Do I stay in Texas? Go where the teaching jobs are? (moving already in future so that one is a given). Keep the boy? Let someone who might not screw him up have him? I cannot even decide if I should let Bob live in Zach's room; Bob being the goldfish Zach won at the Halloween carnival last year. Bob currently resides on my desk in  a softball sized glass bowl . That's why he is still alive. I keep it clean. Feed him regularly. He seems quite content to spend his life in that tiny clear sphere, peering at the yellow clay lion that sits next to his bowl, the one Zach made me for my birthday last year. I love that lion.

Oh to be a goldfish.

I keep thinking that things will start to happen. That one action will trigger another until my life is once again mapped out somewhat. What happens when the nomad falls in love? Gets a son? Two cats and a goldfish? Apparently she buys a green Camaro with racing stripes and black leather seats. Holy Guacamole! 

The thing is though, I am not a traditional woman by any means. That too seems to create some issues. I cannot be with the one I am in love with on a regular basis, thank goodness at this point, so I have been trying to date, sorta. What I have been attempting to do is have friendships with men. Apparently that really does not exist in the mind of a man. What they hear is "I want us to be friends" before we have sex. I said nothing of sex. Still, New Year's Eve, went out, good time, had the moves put on me, or rather laid out across the bed, and I slammed on the brakes immediately. Whoa, Hotrod. This is not going to end well for you. Sigh. 

Everything I do seems to end in a great big HUH???????