recovering from the weekend

I wake every day with a playlist already playing in my head. It is exhausting really because music is the one thing I cannot turn off completely. I tell myself to stop thinking about the past, but my mind wanders there so effortlessly.

I helped my brother and his family ready the house for my youngest nephew's birthday party. Eight four year olds are hard to wrangle. I felt like a shepherd today, getting them from one activity to another, but it was so much fun. I love spending time with my brother's family.

I also thought all weekend about placing Zach in a residential treatment facility. I want to get him accepted into one by the summer so that he can participate in therapy, learn to act as part of a family, and develop some interpersonal skills. While I was without him this weekend, I was stress free seemingly. I try to create an atmosphere where he can learn to be part of a family, but when the family consists of just me for the most part, it is difficult to get him to understand that he has to contribute to the household. I am hoping that interacting with a community of kids like him will help him build bonds and connections.

I have to get some kind of routine going before the fall semester starts, or life will still be crazy. I am ready to return to some semblance of my previous life.