50 miles! At an average of 18mph on my bike. My goal as you know is 100 miles, but I felt pretty good about it. Of course it was just 10 times around the track at an ungodly hour. I normally ride at dusk now, but because I work, I rode early. I need to get to the 100 mile mark and then add in some hilly terrain. I have time to continue training of course. It has been difficult going from mountain bike and trails to road bike and asphalt. The ride seems perfunctory now instead of liberating. To get me through, in my mind, I picture this wonderful man, who once showed me immeasurable patience, who helped me see that I could do it. Thinking about that day and my tiny temper tantrum makes me laugh a little.
He rides with me most days now, in my mind, and when I am done, I put him back on a dusty shelf and go about the rest of my day. He is like a cheerleader in my head, urging me to keep going. I can do it without the cheering, but it makes the long ride seem less lonely.
I had to withdraw from my Cross Timbers race because Zach has a tournament starting that day, and he and his team might just go all the way. Times like this make being a single parent very hard. I mean, being a parent in the last year has already been hard, but having to continually give up plans I have for myself is even harder.
But, you have to do things for your kids, for family, no matter what the cost it seems. I was not shown that interest or consideration while growing up, so I want Zach to know he is that important to me. Plus, I know I will have more races coming up, but he will have only this one tournament for this baseball season for this year. He will have only eight more years of being a "kid," and I should help him make the most out of them even though he hates me most of the time. I should be willing to make sacrifices.
He rides with me most days now, in my mind, and when I am done, I put him back on a dusty shelf and go about the rest of my day. He is like a cheerleader in my head, urging me to keep going. I can do it without the cheering, but it makes the long ride seem less lonely.
I had to withdraw from my Cross Timbers race because Zach has a tournament starting that day, and he and his team might just go all the way. Times like this make being a single parent very hard. I mean, being a parent in the last year has already been hard, but having to continually give up plans I have for myself is even harder.
But, you have to do things for your kids, for family, no matter what the cost it seems. I was not shown that interest or consideration while growing up, so I want Zach to know he is that important to me. Plus, I know I will have more races coming up, but he will have only this one tournament for this baseball season for this year. He will have only eight more years of being a "kid," and I should help him make the most out of them even though he hates me most of the time. I should be willing to make sacrifices.
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