When time is limited, do you just take what you can get or do you turn away mediocrity and strive for getting the whole package?
My mom and dad divorced when I was almost eight years old. They had a difference of opinion, I guess you could say. In any case, my mom left, and my brother and I did not see her for some time. In the interim, she met someone who she loved until the day she died, someone who she was on and off with for over 15 years, someone who was already married. All those years she just dealt with her part-time love. Stolen kisses, weekend rendezvous, missed holidays, phone calls, and numerous let downs. What was it that she got out of this seemingly empty relationship?
She received proposal after proposal from the other men she would date over the years; men she saw when she and her married man were on the outs. There was one in particular who I really liked; a man who took my brother and I camping, served us quail and taught us how to fish. His name was Don, and he came with the whole package.
Don was handsome, kind, intelligent - a Texan for sure - who drove a big truck and owned his own business. I can't remember exactly what he did, but he had a lake house, a cabin and a nice house in the city. He didn't sneak into Mom's apartment and hand my brother and I twenty dollars to run down the street for an hour or so. He included us in whatever they were doing that day. I am sure that they had their "special time," but he never made us feel like we were outsiders, unwanted. Mom said no one too many times. Don walked away.
Mom's married guy had kids of his own, older than my brother and I, and he wanted to wait until they grew up before divorcing his wife.
His wife. She threw a brick through my mom's apartment window and trashed the vinyl top of my mom's canary yellow MG Midget. Mom took it all in stride. It was as if this man was worth all the trouble and heartache. I never really got it. Never understood why she would wait sometimes all day or all weekend for his call.
She was a beautiful woman who could have been happily married for years in the time she waited for her married man to pony up and grow a pair. I can't say that he ever really did. He did ask my mom to marry him a month before she was diagnosed with cancer, and six short months before her death. All that waiting and for what? At her wake, he said he loved her from the moment they met. He had always wanted to be with her. He said all he had now was a heart full of regret. I could see the pain and guilt and sadness in his eyes that day. I handed him the engagement ring he had given Mom. That was the last day I ever saw him.
I get why she waited. She loved him more than any other man. She once said that while growing up, she looked for the true love like she felt her own parents had. She wanted the spark that bounced between those who are meant to be together. She said she could not help that her true love was already married. She would wait. But what did all that waiting get her? What did it cost her?
My mom and dad divorced when I was almost eight years old. They had a difference of opinion, I guess you could say. In any case, my mom left, and my brother and I did not see her for some time. In the interim, she met someone who she loved until the day she died, someone who she was on and off with for over 15 years, someone who was already married. All those years she just dealt with her part-time love. Stolen kisses, weekend rendezvous, missed holidays, phone calls, and numerous let downs. What was it that she got out of this seemingly empty relationship?
She received proposal after proposal from the other men she would date over the years; men she saw when she and her married man were on the outs. There was one in particular who I really liked; a man who took my brother and I camping, served us quail and taught us how to fish. His name was Don, and he came with the whole package.
Don was handsome, kind, intelligent - a Texan for sure - who drove a big truck and owned his own business. I can't remember exactly what he did, but he had a lake house, a cabin and a nice house in the city. He didn't sneak into Mom's apartment and hand my brother and I twenty dollars to run down the street for an hour or so. He included us in whatever they were doing that day. I am sure that they had their "special time," but he never made us feel like we were outsiders, unwanted. Mom said no one too many times. Don walked away.
Mom's married guy had kids of his own, older than my brother and I, and he wanted to wait until they grew up before divorcing his wife.
His wife. She threw a brick through my mom's apartment window and trashed the vinyl top of my mom's canary yellow MG Midget. Mom took it all in stride. It was as if this man was worth all the trouble and heartache. I never really got it. Never understood why she would wait sometimes all day or all weekend for his call.
She was a beautiful woman who could have been happily married for years in the time she waited for her married man to pony up and grow a pair. I can't say that he ever really did. He did ask my mom to marry him a month before she was diagnosed with cancer, and six short months before her death. All that waiting and for what? At her wake, he said he loved her from the moment they met. He had always wanted to be with her. He said all he had now was a heart full of regret. I could see the pain and guilt and sadness in his eyes that day. I handed him the engagement ring he had given Mom. That was the last day I ever saw him.
I get why she waited. She loved him more than any other man. She once said that while growing up, she looked for the true love like she felt her own parents had. She wanted the spark that bounced between those who are meant to be together. She said she could not help that her true love was already married. She would wait. But what did all that waiting get her? What did it cost her?
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