awake

I can't sleep again. I keep thinking what it would be like if I just erased the last year of my life. I know I would lose so much, but I also feel I would gain some peace and forget all the pain. I am so stretched, emotionally and mentally, that my skin is thin like an old, worn out t-shirt. My stomach is on fire, the blaze surging with each new thought, each recurring worry. I know my love was an indiscretion, but it was not malicious.  I am trying to be the good person. I have done everything I have been asked. I even stopped writing. What more should I have to give up to atone for my part? I fell like I am going crazy. Crazy and alone.