Well, I now know why I am not a date-more-than-one-guy-at-a-time type of woman. IT IS EXHAUSTING AND CONFUSING. You develop a rapport with each man, start to build a relationship of sorts, but then WHAM! you start to really like one guy more than the others. I know, this sounds like a good thing, but what about those other really sweet guys? Sigh.
I am caught in this weird state of what-the-hell-do-I-do-now? Honestly, with my track record, what I think is an awesome man, a man who is not perfect, per say, because nobody is perfect, but who is perfect for me, thus far, might turn out to be another wrong turn. If so, then I would have said goodbye to men who I already felt a connection to and be back at square one, again. But if I "string them along," then I feel bad because it seems dishonest somehow, to them AND to the guy I really like.
I can only handle one set of emotions at a time. I can only keep track of one set of likes and dislikes. Sure, I have memorized everything they have told me about each on them, but actually engaging with each one of them, being, I don't know, a Michele who is tailored to each of them, is too much. I do not have to change myself at all with one man, the one who I already like, or at least I do not think I will have to change.
Dating is full of pitfalls. You think you have a handle on everything one minute, and the next minute the dude is yelling at you for not holding his hand long enough. It is insane. But, then I think, I met them on an online dating site. What are the chances they too are dating more than one woman? Likely. Does it make me feel any easier about having multiple "relationships?" Nope. Just means that they could be thinking the same thing - keep these in case this one doesn't work out. I do not like that idea at all.
The bottom line I guess is that I am afraid that this guy will turn out to be like all the others, and I will have hurt a couple of great guys in the process.
I am caught in this weird state of what-the-hell-do-I-do-now? Honestly, with my track record, what I think is an awesome man, a man who is not perfect, per say, because nobody is perfect, but who is perfect for me, thus far, might turn out to be another wrong turn. If so, then I would have said goodbye to men who I already felt a connection to and be back at square one, again. But if I "string them along," then I feel bad because it seems dishonest somehow, to them AND to the guy I really like.
I can only handle one set of emotions at a time. I can only keep track of one set of likes and dislikes. Sure, I have memorized everything they have told me about each on them, but actually engaging with each one of them, being, I don't know, a Michele who is tailored to each of them, is too much. I do not have to change myself at all with one man, the one who I already like, or at least I do not think I will have to change.
Dating is full of pitfalls. You think you have a handle on everything one minute, and the next minute the dude is yelling at you for not holding his hand long enough. It is insane. But, then I think, I met them on an online dating site. What are the chances they too are dating more than one woman? Likely. Does it make me feel any easier about having multiple "relationships?" Nope. Just means that they could be thinking the same thing - keep these in case this one doesn't work out. I do not like that idea at all.
The bottom line I guess is that I am afraid that this guy will turn out to be like all the others, and I will have hurt a couple of great guys in the process.
No comments:
Post a Comment